IN THE SPACE WITH… NELL HARDY
At the core of Old Diorama’s charitable purpose is providing space and opportunities for local and creative communities, and - in so doing - we are fortunate to meet fascinating people doing inspiring things.
This is the latest in a series of interviews with some of the creative people we support and commission at ODAC.
We spoke to Nell Hardy at lunchtime on the second day of her rehearsals for ‘I, Lord’ a show she’s created about spiritual abuse which is premiering on the 30th of October at The Bloomsbury Theatre, and at The Space early next year.
Nell is an ex-homeless actor, writer, theatre-maker and facilitator living, laughing and loving with complex trauma. We met her through her position as one of Arts and Homelessness International's leadership associates 2023-24.
First of all, can you introduce yourself and the show you’re working on?
My name is Nell Hardy. I'm the founder of Response Ability Theatre (RAT) which is a company that seeks to represent and support people whose lives have been derailed in some way by trauma. We are working on a play called ‘I, Lord’, about spiritual abuse and the role that spirituality plays in modern life.
Would you mind sharing what ‘spiritual abuse’ is?
Spiritual abuse is only just beginning to be spoken about and understood more widely. It can be forcing someone to practice or preventing someone from practicing a faith against their will, or any abuse that is justified by the will of a higher power. For example, ‘I'm doing this to you because God wants it’ or ‘I've treated you in this way because the Bible, or Torah or Koran says…’.
Tell us a bit about the show. Why did you feel it was important for this show to be made?
First and foremost, we don't see many stories about faith communities on stage which feels strange to me; because theatres are spiritual spaces, and spiritual spaces are very theatrical.
The show is partly based on experiences that I had of spiritual and faith-based abuse as a young person but within the context of a world that is less and less tolerant of the idea of faith in general. I was aware when I was growing up, that on the one hand, I wasn’t happy with how I was being treated in a faith setting, but on the other, I wasn’t happy with how people outside of that setting spoke about my faith.
What are the challenges, societally, regarding dealing with spiritual abuse and how does your show deal with those?
One main challenge is that we victim-blame in a way that we're getting out of the habit of doing in other situations. More of us now recognise that it's unacceptable to say to a woman ‘Well you were wearing a short skirt so it was your fault’, but we're not so used to saying ‘Well, if that happened at church, then why didn't you just stop going.’
Faith practice is seen as a choice, which to some extent it is, but it also meets a need we all have: to connect our values to how and why we live. If your way of doing that is only welcomed within your faith community, it is extremely hard to leave that community even if you are being mistreated within it. This show doesn't condemn faith communities at all. Rather, it asks: what role does faith play in our lives? What other ways do people outside of faith settings have to meet (or avoid) their own spiritual-philosophical needs? How can we all understand, respect and support each other better?
What particularly inspired you and what experiences have you drawn on to create this piece?
I write a lot from lived experience. RAT's first show ‘NoMad’ was about my experiences of homelessness and mental health hospitalisation, and there I wrote purely my own story because I didn't want anyone to be able to claim it was unrealistic, and felt it was an under-explored intersectional experience to which I could speak authentically. With this show, however, I was so aware of how under-explored the whole enormous issue of spiritual abuse is, that I knew I needed to capture a wider remit than what lay purely within my own experience. I was informed by conversations with people that I've known from other faiths, and I watched a lot of documentaries and did a lot of reading about the origins of faith and the function that it's played over time.
Can you tell us a bit more about ‘I, Lord’?
Well, I'll start by saying that it's actually two shows. The full show, and also a show for five to 11-year-olds which will happen at the same time, partly so that parents who want to see the main show don’t have to worry about childcare.
The children’s show explores similar themes, but in an age-appropriate way, so that the families will be able to come back together and discuss it afterwards. It’s something we’re excited about!
And the adult version is suitable for 12+ year-olds?
Yeah, they'll be alright!
And what can people expect to see?
The kids' show is by two facilitators. The kids think that they're going into a kind of ‘Sunday school’ situation. They're going to play games, draw and make music with a spiritual leader, but (spoiler alert!) the spiritual leader doesn't turn up. So the two ‘volunteers’ (actors) have to go through these clues that the spiritual leader has left.
The clues that are left are stories and images from various religious texts and traditions. And then the tasks are to do with making music with instruments that have been used in spiritual practice, playing drama games to engage with ideas associated with faith, making art inspired by spiritual feeling, things like that.
It helps the kids to celebrate diversity rather than thinking ‘This is right and that's wrong’. It will be fun, but also give young people some tools to help protect themselves from spiritual abuse in the future, by pulling apart any misconceptions around ‘This is a spiritual leader – I must accept everything they say at face value’.
And the Adult show?
The audience is immersed in the church setting. When they arrive, they are given service sheets, and the story unfolds in a format like that of a Church of England communion service. There are hymns and responses, readings and a sermon etc.
It follows that pattern, but the scenes happen as if the audience's mind is drifting from what the priest is doing at that point. So, it kind of echoes the experience that a trauma survivor might have of going to a service: the scenes are memories, flashbacks, moments of dissociation.
It’s trying to capture that visceral sense of being part of something that is so grounding and communal and elevating, but at the same time seeing things going wrong, seeing things that shouldn't be happening. Do I actually want to call out what's happening when the structure around it is doing me so much good?
Finally, would you mind telling us about your connection to ODAC and how you’ve found working here?
ODAC is a beam of light in my life! I came across you through the AHI Leadership programme and talked to Daniel and Claire about this project. They were quick to offer me free space for my workshops and rehearsals. Spending more time here, I’ve come to meet and get to work with other members of the ODAC community, such as Bahja Mahamed, an extraordinary artist who is now doing her very first bit of theatre designing on my show, working alongside experienced set designer, Victoria Maytom. I’ve also got to know the Naz & Matt Foundation [a group supported here at ODAC], an organisation doing important work focused on supporting religious parents to support their LGBTQ+ children.
The space we get to use is gorgeous and everyone I’ve met on the desk has been interested in the work we’re doing. It feels like a very safe and very professional space. That combination is so important, and quite rare.
Thank you to Nell Hardy for taking time out of her busy rehearsal schedule to chat with us.
More details about the show, including tickets: www.responseabilitytheatre.com/i-lord
